Hi guys, no shame here - we are all doing fabulously well for BEING here, big hugs and whoops of applause for all!
Okay, why do I get nights still when I overeat? Here’s what I’ve come up with, it’s not perfect, but still:
- I am tired and want a break from all the ‘to do’; overeating is a very very very firm sign that I am taking a break from life
- I want to comfort/treat myself – I need to build in alternatives
- I think it’s what I really want
- It’s entrenched habit
I had a pizza last night, blech. But interestingly, I knew at the time that what I really wanted was a hot shower, to light some candles and chill out. But eating the pizza did not bring me comfort and relaxation. I was tense, I ate it at my desk, I felt tired. But because I had it, I ate it. I made myself throw it out halfway through, sanity returned, but still.
I also know that when I don’t drink enough water, I feel clogged and ‘dirty’ with coffee (physically, it’s not a mental thing), and it leads me to make poor choices.
I’m also sluggish and tired with the darker mornings; I’ve not been walking enough either. But I have bought my new pedometer, I threw out the pizza, I’m obviously carrying on as usual! But it’s interesting to get some insight into why I overeat. I barely understand myself even as I’m doing it. It’s like I’m looking for some ‘high’ which food does not give me any more or something. It’s like I need to address other things in my life (my terrible on/off relationship).
Anyway, one of the things I wanted to do this week was to shine a light on my impulses and dig deeper a little. I'm not 'perfect' with my eating, I struggle and I have ups and downs. It's not hard but it's not easy either, if that makes sense.
Ramble ramble ramble...
Hope all is well with everyone - I've packed healthy food for the day, I've got my pedometer, I'm aiming for a super healthy Tuesday when food is not an issue, just a means to an end!