happyhealthy
Omnomnomnom
Or when someone asks you "Do you want a chocolate?", you say yes please and they reply (sarcastically) "Ask a stupid question". Or is did just seem to happen to me lol?
Fat Experiences
- Thread starter Samprand
- Start date
Book-Worm
Silver Member
I hate eating in public. I really hate going out full stop, but eating in public is one of the worst things.
And I'm terrified of flimsy chairs. This weekend, I had to sit on a flimsy garden chair for family photos. I wasn't really happy with the photos to start with, but on top of that I was trying not to put all my weight on the chair as I was terrified it'd break in front of everyone
Oh god where to begin, I think I’ve forgotten or blanked out most of the comments and names.
A locum Dr who was standing in for my GP once asked me if “my balls had dropped” (i was 17 at the time) when i said of course they had I’d gone through puberty years ago, he said “oh its not puppy fat then”. Mortified I just walked out and suffered with an ear infection.
Was at Alton towers on the ripsaw once when the ride wouldn’t start (apparently the bar didn’t come down enough) and i had to be escorted to the and I quote “fat man seats”
A few years ago in my old job we used to have to travel around a lot to clients, I got stuck in a client’s turnstile! Whilst two of my colleagues (one of which is now my best friend) burst out laughing. I knew I would have trouble fitting through it, but really didn’t want to buzz to ask for the gate to be opened. That turnstile was really small I watched a lot of “average sized people” breath in whilst going through.
I have to admit I’m my own worst enemy though because like many overweight people we adopt two routes when it comes to self esteem and self confidence, either shy away from social gatherings and withdraw inwards, or put on confidence and become “bubbly” and “loud”, I chose the latter and adopted what I like to call my gimmick.
I learnt a long time ago, be loud, be some what brash and fake confidence, I also developed i guess what many would call a quick wit, basically i can be quite acid tongued, if some one gives me a put down straight to my face with out thinking in a split second im fire back with some half baked witty comment/put down of my own fired at them (which i do honestly regret as i once really upset some one once in a club by doing so) I never wanted to be the first on the dance floor or to get up for karaoke but knew if I wasn’t the first id be the last or not get their at all. And yet still have the pain and hurt of people looking at me staring and making their comments. Which is why I’ve kind of adopted the “I don’t give a f**k attitude” and since I was 19 any one who meets me assumes I’m a confident person when really I’m not confident at all, its all one big fat lie.
Basically anything that draws attention to myself, bright/neon pink/green/blue/yellow purple/rainbow haired Mohawk been there done that. Any excuse for fancy dress round town, I’ve been a pimp, a baby (complete with baby grow and bottle), friar tuck, bat man, a sumo, Vicky pollard, my favourite was a French maid complete with high heels, fake nails, a skirt that even if I wasn’t a man and was a woman with an amazing figure would have been too short and stockings! It’s easier to convince yourself that others are looking at you because of what your wearing and how “out there” and confident you are etc than it is because your fat and over weight. In many ways it’s a control thing almost like I have convinced my self i am in control of what people think about me and see me as.
Any way I’m rambling on and not making too much sense at all, People can be so cruel sometimes
A locum Dr who was standing in for my GP once asked me if “my balls had dropped” (i was 17 at the time) when i said of course they had I’d gone through puberty years ago, he said “oh its not puppy fat then”. Mortified I just walked out and suffered with an ear infection.
Was at Alton towers on the ripsaw once when the ride wouldn’t start (apparently the bar didn’t come down enough) and i had to be escorted to the and I quote “fat man seats”
A few years ago in my old job we used to have to travel around a lot to clients, I got stuck in a client’s turnstile! Whilst two of my colleagues (one of which is now my best friend) burst out laughing. I knew I would have trouble fitting through it, but really didn’t want to buzz to ask for the gate to be opened. That turnstile was really small I watched a lot of “average sized people” breath in whilst going through.
I have to admit I’m my own worst enemy though because like many overweight people we adopt two routes when it comes to self esteem and self confidence, either shy away from social gatherings and withdraw inwards, or put on confidence and become “bubbly” and “loud”, I chose the latter and adopted what I like to call my gimmick.
I learnt a long time ago, be loud, be some what brash and fake confidence, I also developed i guess what many would call a quick wit, basically i can be quite acid tongued, if some one gives me a put down straight to my face with out thinking in a split second im fire back with some half baked witty comment/put down of my own fired at them (which i do honestly regret as i once really upset some one once in a club by doing so) I never wanted to be the first on the dance floor or to get up for karaoke but knew if I wasn’t the first id be the last or not get their at all. And yet still have the pain and hurt of people looking at me staring and making their comments. Which is why I’ve kind of adopted the “I don’t give a f**k attitude” and since I was 19 any one who meets me assumes I’m a confident person when really I’m not confident at all, its all one big fat lie.
Basically anything that draws attention to myself, bright/neon pink/green/blue/yellow purple/rainbow haired Mohawk been there done that. Any excuse for fancy dress round town, I’ve been a pimp, a baby (complete with baby grow and bottle), friar tuck, bat man, a sumo, Vicky pollard, my favourite was a French maid complete with high heels, fake nails, a skirt that even if I wasn’t a man and was a woman with an amazing figure would have been too short and stockings! It’s easier to convince yourself that others are looking at you because of what your wearing and how “out there” and confident you are etc than it is because your fat and over weight. In many ways it’s a control thing almost like I have convinced my self i am in control of what people think about me and see me as.
Any way I’m rambling on and not making too much sense at all, People can be so cruel sometimes
Jettica
Shoot to thrill
This I do too. I've made myself be a confident person, loud, often crass and somewhat in your face. People laugh at my wit and I feel popular, even if I never was in school.
I go into job interviews and they tell me how my confidence impressed them and how they need a confident person. And yet any time I have to meet someone or pick up the phone to talk to someone I'm shitting myself.
I guess we are good at putting on a mask to hide all those little insecurities. They way I think of it is, how will I feel when I am thin and I've lost all that self-consciousness. Will I feel more comfortable around people and the confidence will be natural?
But, dude, I know where you are coming from!
I've been thinking about this to and to be honest i have no idea if i will feel confident and comfortable around people. or at least enough so i can drop my "gimmick".
I sure hope I am, its one of those things where we learnt to act this way to cope with what we've been going through, i guess only time will tell.
Its quite a scary thought though isnt it? going through this journey reaching the end target ( a hell of a long way off only at the start my road), yet still being the shy unsecure " fat kid" but this time with nothing to hide behind no mask to put up.
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Fionat29
Still trying!
Unfortunately self-consciousness (if that's a word) may not just go because you feel you look great. I've known some people who look like c**p but have been brought up to believe that they are better than everyone else on this planet no matter what size or shape. And it really seems to work, not a put on show, an absolute belief in themselves.
I really wish I had it, although I'm better than I was.
I really wish I had it, although I'm better than I was.
TrimTrixy
Full Member
I'm still quite standoffish with people, I don't mean to be rude it's just my defence mechanism. I've lost 5 stone and I'm not keen on the attention that can bring, eg "have you lost weight?" people are just being nice and it's all totally my issue. I went to zumba on my own last night ( my best mate was busy) and didn't speak to anyone, did the class and left ( it's only a small group) the friends I've got are very good friends I've had along time, but I'm not good making new friends. Sound like a right laugh don't I?!! So in answer to your question, I'm still the same inside, fat or slimmer. I didn't wake up with a new personality. Maybe it depends how long you've had a weight problem? I was a fat kid/ teenager so obviously that's when my character traits sp? Were developing?
wow Trimtrixy 5 stone is an amazing amount to loose you must be so proud of yourself (even if slightly embarrassed when people compliment you)
I imagine many are in the same situation as yourself, in that loosing weight isn't the quick fix to having instant confidence.
I find people and how we interact completly fascinating, every one does it so differently and achieves such differing levels of success, yet the vast majority of us all want the same things in life and many has the same goals and values (in a round about way)
I imagine many are in the same situation as yourself, in that loosing weight isn't the quick fix to having instant confidence.
I find people and how we interact completly fascinating, every one does it so differently and achieves such differing levels of success, yet the vast majority of us all want the same things in life and many has the same goals and values (in a round about way)
small steps
Full Member
I identify with some comments. I haven't had any mean comments as such, just some that I didn't know how to take: I don't know if it was my low self esteem about my weight, making me assume the worst.
Recently a stranger on the tube offered me their seat. I refused the seat, thought what a lovely man, then 'I wonder if he thinks I'm pregnant?'
On the positive side, I have noticed that since I started dieting, I have felt much more confident within myself - stonger and more positive.
This thread has made me feel depressed (why are people so nasty?) and comforted (by others sharing their situations - thank you).
Recently a stranger on the tube offered me their seat. I refused the seat, thought what a lovely man, then 'I wonder if he thinks I'm pregnant?'
On the positive side, I have noticed that since I started dieting, I have felt much more confident within myself - stonger and more positive.
This thread has made me feel depressed (why are people so nasty?) and comforted (by others sharing their situations - thank you).
1974rach
Gold Member
Over the years I've had some heartbreakers...
Most recently though, I met someone through an internet site, and we spent a couple of months texting each other. He asked if he could add me on FB, and I've not heard from him since. I can only assume he took one look and thought "too fat!"
xxx
Most recently though, I met someone through an internet site, and we spent a couple of months texting each other. He asked if he could add me on FB, and I've not heard from him since. I can only assume he took one look and thought "too fat!"
xxx
sparklychar
Doing this for last time
At my 2 year old nephews party today, a child pointed at me and said 'baby'... I hope they were not referring to my belly.... Xxx
boggins
Silver Member
Two stories, one from over a decade ago (I've been fat that long! :cry, one recent.
In my first year at University my boyfriend went drinking in the college bar, and there happened to be a guy from just down the hall there. My boyfriend said something about me being 19, and the guy replied "Yeah, 19 stone!". For some reason, my boyfriend decided to TELL ME that this had happened! I was mortified.
Much more recently, I've started fostering rescue cats again. We currently have a white male who sheds his fur constantly- honestly we could stuff a pillow a day with it! One day he'd been sat on my lap, left a nice little carpet of fur, and then jumped to the floor. So I took a pic of my knee, in fur-coated blue jeans, with the cat in the background, and texted it to my mum, commenting on the fur he sheds. She replied, "What's that huge blue thing in the foreground?"
That would be my knee, mum......
, one recent.In my first year at University my boyfriend went drinking in the college bar, and there happened to be a guy from just down the hall there. My boyfriend said something about me being 19, and the guy replied "Yeah, 19 stone!". For some reason, my boyfriend decided to TELL ME that this had happened! I was mortified.
Much more recently, I've started fostering rescue cats again. We currently have a white male who sheds his fur constantly- honestly we could stuff a pillow a day with it! One day he'd been sat on my lap, left a nice little carpet of fur, and then jumped to the floor. So I took a pic of my knee, in fur-coated blue jeans, with the cat in the background, and texted it to my mum, commenting on the fur he sheds. She replied, "What's that huge blue thing in the foreground?"
That would be my knee, mum......
Elemental
Chasing the Rainbow
Two stories, one from over a decade ago (I've been fat that long! :cry
In my first year at University my boyfriend went drinking in the college bar, and there happened to be a guy from just down the hall there. My boyfriend said something about me being 19, and the guy replied "Yeah, 19 stone!". For some reason, my boyfriend decided to TELL ME that this had happened! I was mortified.
Much more recently, I've started fostering rescue cats again. We currently have a white male who sheds his fur constantly- honestly we could stuff a pillow a day with it! One day he'd been sat on my lap, left a nice little carpet of fur, and then jumped to the floor. So I took a pic of my knee, in fur-coated blue jeans, with the cat in the background, and texted it to my mum, commenting on the fur he sheds. She replied, "What's that huge blue thing in the foreground?"
That would be my knee, mum......
My word what an @rsehole in the first story!!!
My mum can be pretty blunt sometimes too, i know it bothers her that i'm so overweight, sometimes it actually feels like what i have to say is less valid because of the way i look. My family are quite superficial that way - which is ironic as i blatantly got my fat genes from them!!
Some of the people on this thread are just too sensitive. If you are overweight people will comment. It is something you can remedy, though it takes discipline an in some cases medical advice/help. Some comments are rude and insensitive, others are fairly innocuous. Three months ago I was over five stone overweight and getting slagged. Now I still 3 stone overweight and getting more pleasant comments and encouragement. There is no excuse for remaining overweight (in my case I am wheat intolerant so finding that out helped) so stop whinging and get on with it. Get allergy tested etc and then commit to healthy eating. That includes stopping overeating. Good luck to all.
Samprand
WILL do it!
well done on the weight loss mod
but i have to say, that i dont think we are "whinging" or being "too sensitive"
as u used to be 5 stone overweight surely u can understand that some of us feel down about ourselves, and in the case of some of these stories, other peoples comments have been intentionally very cruel and unnecessary, starting a cycle of feeling worse about ourselves, comfort eating, and then feeling even worse.
u must know how hard it can be to eat healthily and control portions etc, not all of us see it as black and white as you obviously do
but at least being on this site means we are trying to change, its definitely a positive step
but i have to say, that i dont think we are "whinging" or being "too sensitive"
as u used to be 5 stone overweight surely u can understand that some of us feel down about ourselves, and in the case of some of these stories, other peoples comments have been intentionally very cruel and unnecessary, starting a cycle of feeling worse about ourselves, comfort eating, and then feeling even worse.
u must know how hard it can be to eat healthily and control portions etc, not all of us see it as black and white as you obviously do
but at least being on this site means we are trying to change, its definitely a positive step
TrimTrixy
Full Member
I wouldn't say it was whinging, I found it quite therapeutic to talk about experiences that frankly most other people don't relate to. I have done something about my weight and will continue to do so as everyone here is also doing. Surely if we can't talk on here, then where can we talk?
This is all since I gained the last stone. They all happened on the same road too! The doctor mentioned my weight in a pretty disgusting way. I was also out with 4 people a month or so ago and a teenage boy shouted "fatty" because we ignored him when he tried to get our attention. It was obviously aimed at me as I was the biggest one there. Also, a bit further up the road I was with two others (tiny bit tipsy, but not shouting) a woman in her car said something like "fat slags" we were all covered head to toe :/ one is a size 6, the other a size 14 and then theres me at a size 18 - it was obviously aimed at me. I think the area I moved to is partly to blame (moving again asap) but if I didn't look so huge it obviously wouldn't have happened
but if I didn't look so huge it obviously wouldn't have happened
Dont think like that chick, these people would have more than likely made comments regardless wether it be aimmed at you or some one else, because thats the type of person they are, insecure bullys
keep smiling
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