RD's life diary: I'm back (sort of)
- Thread starter Russiandoll
- Start date
Russiandoll
Carpe diem
I don't know if it's something in the air, or the dreadfully depressing weather or just the phenomenal stress I've been under lately but I'm so tired it's just plain daft!
My eyes are constantly stinging and I feel I could nod off at the drop of a hat. Despite this, I find myself waking up almost every morning at about 4am
. Annoyed, I lie there tossing and turning and usually manage to get back to sleep about an hour later. Then I wake up feeling like I've had no sleep at all!
Is anyone else feeling so tired they need matchsticks to keep their eyes open?
We need some serious sunshine I think ... I HATE all this grey!!
My eyes are constantly stinging and I feel I could nod off at the drop of a hat. Despite this, I find myself waking up almost every morning at about 4am
. Annoyed, I lie there tossing and turning and usually manage to get back to sleep about an hour later. Then I wake up feeling like I've had no sleep at all!Is anyone else feeling so tired they need matchsticks to keep their eyes open?
We need some serious sunshine I think ... I HATE all this grey!!
Barb
Gold Member
Hi RD, yep I feel exactly the same at the moment, (twins seperated at birth maybe?) I think it is simply the stress. With my Mum now in hospital and my post-operative partially blind Dad to care for I don't know whether I am comin or going either. How is your Dad doing? Did he have the draining done? Hope he is feeling more comfortable and that you and yours are ok.
Lots of love
Lots of love
Isobel1965
Gold Member
Thinking of you, darling xxxxxxx
Russiandoll
Carpe diem
After almost a week in hospital, my dad STILL hasn't had the fluid drained from his lungs. Apparantly he's having a CT scan first to ascertain what's caused it (they think that the cancer has progressed to his lung).
Of course, there's a queue for the CT scan so he's booked in for early this coming week. It's all pretty stressful for him with not knowing quite what's going on.
He's been told several times this week that the procedure was going to be performed that day just to get to the end of the day and realise it wasn't going to happen.
Last night, my eldest daughter picked my mum up so I could have a night off but it ended up as anything but. My sister who lives in the road next to mine went away to Turkey for two weeks yesterday, leaving her 16 year old son to look after the house (it evidently isn't cool for someone with such kudos to holiday with one's family).
Whilst she was being taken to Gatwick for her 8pm flight, my mum rang to say she'd driven past my sister's house and there were a load of youngsters in it. She'd stopped off to have a word with my nephew but didn't manage to get anyone to leave.
She was really worried abot my sister's house and what might happen if the party escalated. Hubby and me went round and, by that time, there were in excess of 40 teenagers there with more pouring in as we arrived. Some were hanging around outside putting their beer cans on the roof of my sister's mini.
I saw red and told the perpetrators to get their ^$*&ing cans off the car and then accidentally poked one of them in the eye with my brolly. Luckily, they didn't see fit to remonstrate with me: mind you, by that time I was practically thermo nuclear so they probably thought better of it!
Inside, hubby cleared them all out of the house ... it was a worrying time as lots of them were the local scumbags and thieves, who'd think nothing of laying the boot in. Fortunatly, hubby is firm but diplomatic and managed to get them out without a fight erupting.
I lost it with my nephew: half of Gosport's criminal fraternity now knows what's in my sister's house and that she's away for two weeks ... I was hopping mad!
Luckily, the party was ended before it really had time to take hold and apart from some chewing gum spat on her tiled kitchen floor, there was no damage to my sister's house. My mum had called the police and they arrived and took statements: they said that because of type of people that had been there (all well-known to the police), there could be stuff nicked that might not be noticed straight away and that my sister could contact them if she discovers stuff missing after she gets home.
After everything calmed down, I got my 19 year old daughter and her 23 year old boyfriend to sit with my nephew for the night and went home to phone my mum and tell her everything was calm and my sister's house was still standing!
She didn't need this stress and that's what made me angriest ... GRRRR kids!!
Of course, there's a queue for the CT scan so he's booked in for early this coming week. It's all pretty stressful for him with not knowing quite what's going on.
He's been told several times this week that the procedure was going to be performed that day just to get to the end of the day and realise it wasn't going to happen.
Last night, my eldest daughter picked my mum up so I could have a night off but it ended up as anything but. My sister who lives in the road next to mine went away to Turkey for two weeks yesterday, leaving her 16 year old son to look after the house (it evidently isn't cool for someone with such kudos to holiday with one's family
).Whilst she was being taken to Gatwick for her 8pm flight, my mum rang to say she'd driven past my sister's house and there were a load of youngsters in it. She'd stopped off to have a word with my nephew but didn't manage to get anyone to leave.
She was really worried abot my sister's house and what might happen if the party escalated. Hubby and me went round and, by that time, there were in excess of 40 teenagers there with more pouring in as we arrived. Some were hanging around outside putting their beer cans on the roof of my sister's mini.
I saw red and told the perpetrators to get their ^$*&ing cans off the car and then accidentally poked one of them in the eye with my brolly. Luckily, they didn't see fit to remonstrate with me: mind you, by that time I was practically thermo nuclear so they probably thought better of it!
Inside, hubby cleared them all out of the house ... it was a worrying time as lots of them were the local scumbags and thieves, who'd think nothing of laying the boot in. Fortunatly, hubby is firm but diplomatic and managed to get them out without a fight erupting.
I lost it with my nephew: half of Gosport's criminal fraternity now knows what's in my sister's house and that she's away for two weeks ... I was hopping mad!
Luckily, the party was ended before it really had time to take hold and apart from some chewing gum spat on her tiled kitchen floor, there was no damage to my sister's house. My mum had called the police and they arrived and took statements: they said that because of type of people that had been there (all well-known to the police), there could be stuff nicked that might not be noticed straight away and that my sister could contact them if she discovers stuff missing after she gets home.
After everything calmed down, I got my 19 year old daughter and her 23 year old boyfriend to sit with my nephew for the night and went home to phone my mum and tell her everything was calm and my sister's house was still standing!
She didn't need this stress and that's what made me angriest ... GRRRR kids!!
Russiandoll
Carpe diem
Well, the thread title says it all really.
When I was at my lightest just before Christmas (but still 2.5st from goal) I put all my size 22 knickers (practically brand new I must add) into the rag bag under the sink.
Months have passed, stones have been regained and today, I had the humiliating task of getting them back out of the rag bag again! Incidentally, I hadn't actually used them for anything so there's no fear of me getting Windolene anywhere it shouldn't be - but what an embarrassment!
There's a lot going on in my life right now but this slide back into morbid obesity is so demoralising. I have to try as hard as possible to claw back some ground!
When I was at my lightest just before Christmas (but still 2.5st from goal) I put all my size 22 knickers (practically brand new I must add) into the rag bag under the sink.
Months have passed, stones have been regained and today, I had the humiliating task of getting them back out of the rag bag again! Incidentally, I hadn't actually used them for anything so there's no fear of me getting Windolene anywhere it shouldn't be - but what an embarrassment!
There's a lot going on in my life right now but this slide back into morbid obesity is so demoralising. I have to try as hard as possible to claw back some ground!
jane
Opinionated
'A LOt' is something of an under statement !
Of course you want to start undoing the damage,but don't expect too much from your self.
The stress is already giving you insomnia.
Hopefully things will have settled from the current fever pitch to a less frantic, though still difficult I fear, level in a weak or so.
Russiandoll
Carpe diem
My dad had his CT scan yesterday to ascertain whereabouts the fluid on his lung was situated so it could be drained.
Today, a specialist spoke to him and said that it isn't fluid at all ... it looks like the cancer has spread to his lungs so he is now just about riddled and the future looks very bleak.
He's having a biopsy tomorrow, I suppose to investigate the true extent of whats happening although I know there will be no treatment offered - just pallative care.
My poor dad ... my poor mum.
Today, a specialist spoke to him and said that it isn't fluid at all ... it looks like the cancer has spread to his lungs so he is now just about riddled and the future looks very bleak.
He's having a biopsy tomorrow, I suppose to investigate the true extent of whats happening although I know there will be no treatment offered - just pallative care.
My poor dad ... my poor mum.
Isobel1965
Gold Member
Oh sweetie, I am so very sorry!
Sending you mega-hugs and all my love!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Sending you mega-hugs and all my love!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Russiandoll
Carpe diem
Thanks for your kind comments - knowing others are thinking of me and my family is a great comfort.
One of the things that always strikes me about awful situations is that the mundane aspects of life still have to be attended to - even though it's the last thing you want to be devoting time to.
My car goes in for its MOT this morning ... it's tax runs out today and (depending on the outcome of the MOT) that will need attending to. The laundry still keeps coming, the bills still insist on piling up and shopping needs to be done. All this is done resentfully and in a robot-like mode - it somehow seems surreal that my dad is dying and there I am buying Kellogs Frosties.
My nephew James' ashes haven't even been interred yet but now we also have the reality of my dad's terminal illness staring us in the face.
I thought I'd post a photo which, I think, speaks of the special relationship between me (the eldest of four daughters) and my dear dad. It was taken on the big family reunion night I arranged back in February (extra poignant as it's the last time we were all together with James too). It's a bit blurred but is a picture I will always treasure.
One of the things that always strikes me about awful situations is that the mundane aspects of life still have to be attended to - even though it's the last thing you want to be devoting time to.
My car goes in for its MOT this morning ... it's tax runs out today and (depending on the outcome of the MOT) that will need attending to. The laundry still keeps coming, the bills still insist on piling up and shopping needs to be done. All this is done resentfully and in a robot-like mode - it somehow seems surreal that my dad is dying and there I am buying Kellogs Frosties.
My nephew James' ashes haven't even been interred yet but now we also have the reality of my dad's terminal illness staring us in the face.
I thought I'd post a photo which, I think, speaks of the special relationship between me (the eldest of four daughters) and my dear dad. It was taken on the big family reunion night I arranged back in February (extra poignant as it's the last time we were all together with James too). It's a bit blurred but is a picture I will always treasure.
FatFairNForty(ish)
Gold Member
No words will do justice Debbie..
In my thoughts and prayers
Much love
Jennie
xx
In my thoughts and prayers
Much love
Jennie
xx
Lesly Cambridge
Cambridge Consultant
Debbie, I'm so very sorry to hear your news, and send my thoughts and best wishes to you and your family. What a lovely photograph of you with your dad, for you to have forever close.
