*Emsie*
Gold Member
You haven't? Oh no ....they are really nice.....but the bad news is they aren't going to be doing them any more I don't know if you have heard?
Unthoughtful people!
- Thread starter Bunnylush
- Start date
lilbabyfish
Silver Member
Dear eBay user...
Don't bid on my stuff if you don't actually want it! Grr!
Don't bid on my stuff if you don't actually want it! Grr!
ellierose988
Silver Member
Dear Grandparents,
Honestly, I do love you, and it's nice to see you after so long, but I'm really having to bite my tongue around some of your comments (mainly grandma) so I need to rant on here a bit to let it out!
I thought it might be nice to make some dinner for us all this evening as I wasn't feeling too great last night and felt bad for not being around to welcome you... it wasn't really the nicest reaction from you, just basically going on and on about what you don't like or "can't have"'... and bearing in mind Mum had got some plaice fillet, but had decided to freeze it instead so that I can make something for us... it wasn't really the nicest thing for you just to end up saying "we like plaice"...
So I give up and put my recipe book back, only for you to laugh out loud and say "Oh, she doesn't know how to cook that" (about the plaice).
Of course I know how to cook plaice. And I would have been happy to do plaice for you, I just thought it would be nice to make something a bit more interesting. But forget it.
Also, mum and dad don't eat bread - there's a wholemeal loaf that's mine, I use to weigh out for my heb, and we specially got you a white loaf... so wasn't very happy to find you'd eaten my bread instead.
Whoosh. Rant over.
Honestly, I do love you, and it's nice to see you after so long, but I'm really having to bite my tongue around some of your comments (mainly grandma) so I need to rant on here a bit to let it out!
I thought it might be nice to make some dinner for us all this evening as I wasn't feeling too great last night and felt bad for not being around to welcome you... it wasn't really the nicest reaction from you, just basically going on and on about what you don't like or "can't have"'... and bearing in mind Mum had got some plaice fillet, but had decided to freeze it instead so that I can make something for us... it wasn't really the nicest thing for you just to end up saying "we like plaice"...
So I give up and put my recipe book back, only for you to laugh out loud and say "Oh, she doesn't know how to cook that" (about the plaice).
Of course I know how to cook plaice. And I would have been happy to do plaice for you, I just thought it would be nice to make something a bit more interesting. But forget it.
Also, mum and dad don't eat bread - there's a wholemeal loaf that's mine, I use to weigh out for my heb, and we specially got you a white loaf... so wasn't very happy to find you'd eaten my bread instead.
Whoosh. Rant over.
Korrigan
Full Member
Dear son,
No, it's not "give and take" - if we're being brutally honest it's more give on my part and take on yours and I know 17 can be a selfish age but that aside I have asked time and again very nicely since January for you to put the Christmas decorations back into the attic. I don't ask you to do much - empty the dishwasher now and again and keep the den tidy as it's used almost solely by you and your mates. It's now April and they were still sitting in 2 large festive carrier bags on the landing. They were getting on my nerves. It will only take 20 mins out of the 8 bloody hours a day you seem to be spending on your XBox over the Easter holidays.
So no - it's not "ridiculously unfair" of me to deposit all the stuff I've asked you time and again to put into the attic in your bedroom. It's now off the landing and the house doesn't look like a charity shop for the first time in weeks.
No, it's not "give and take" - if we're being brutally honest it's more give on my part and take on yours and I know 17 can be a selfish age but that aside I have asked time and again very nicely since January for you to put the Christmas decorations back into the attic. I don't ask you to do much - empty the dishwasher now and again and keep the den tidy as it's used almost solely by you and your mates. It's now April and they were still sitting in 2 large festive carrier bags on the landing. They were getting on my nerves. It will only take 20 mins out of the 8 bloody hours a day you seem to be spending on your XBox over the Easter holidays.
So no - it's not "ridiculously unfair" of me to deposit all the stuff I've asked you time and again to put into the attic in your bedroom. It's now off the landing and the house doesn't look like a charity shop for the first time in weeks.
*Emsie*
Gold Member
Can understand where you are coming from! have a 20 year old daughter who is very similar! and a hubby who can be as bad sometimes and a 10 and 12 year old that seem to be going the same way! :sigh:
Hope it gets up to the attic now for you without too much too-ing and fro-ing!
Korrigan
Full Member
So do I! He's not a bad kid at all to be fair. But I hate having to ask again and again as it makes me sound like a nag.
liliferjade
Wishful shrinking
I've not got any children myself yet but I would like to think when I have children I would do the same. If you ask your children to do you a favour and when they don't do it, just do it for them they are going to think everythimg works like that and just be lazy and walk all over you. It's not gonna hurt him to do a few little favours every now and then so I don't blame you for moving it into his room 
Korrigan
Full Member
And why can't you do it?
Obviously not to heavy for you since you put them in his room.
Honestly, you all moan about equality then still expect us to do all the "manly" jobs.
Sent from my iPod touch using MiniMins
Tsk...I do my fair share of "manly" jobs as it is thank you very much.
This week I cleared out and demolished the old shed and stacked the wood to the side of the outhouse (calling it that sounds posher than it is), mowed and strimmed the grass, unblocked the loo (this meant accessing the external sewer pipe :sigh and fixed the vacuum cleaner. **polishes halo**There are two things that worry me needlessly - pigeons and heights. Third step on the stepladder and I get the shakes.
Putting stuff in the attic is a two man job. I'm quite happy to be the floor guy handing stuff up but there is no way I could be the one in the attic. I'm a 48 year old woman with access to a lithe 17 year old. It's basic common sense in my view. 
Shirleen
Gold Member
ColJack said:And why can't you do it?
Obviously not to heavy for you since you put them in his room.
Honestly, you all moan about equality then still expect us to do all the "manly" jobs.
Sent from my iPod touch using MiniMins
And why should she ? He's living there probably rent free. Its not too much for kids to do jobs for themselves!
liliferjade
Wishful shrinking
I noticed the wink
OOOOHHH I could go on for a very very long time......
Dear Ex,
Please stop letting our son down and leaving me to pick up the pieces!
Dear OH,
I know I have been saying for 5 years that "I really am fed up of being fat and mean it this time... I am going to do it" but now I really do mean it and I just want you to believe in me just a little.
Dear driving instructor,
I am trying to be more confident with roundabouts but they are rather scary!
Dear Ex,
Please stop letting our son down and leaving me to pick up the pieces!
Dear OH,
I know I have been saying for 5 years that "I really am fed up of being fat and mean it this time... I am going to do it" but now I really do mean it and I just want you to believe in me just a little.
Dear driving instructor,
I am trying to be more confident with roundabouts but they are rather scary!
Shirleen
Gold Member
Dear Dorts "father",
Dort is away with you this weekend, do she can meet your other kids, one of whom you've only known about for six months. She doesn't know you as you decided to stay away til she was 18 and miss out on paying maintenance. So don't you think it's out of order to all talk about the past, and your mum and dad considering she is the only one who hasn't met them?
Did you know she is texting me all the time because she is upset? I doubt it you worm!!!
Just man up for once and be a bloody adult and realise its hard for her!
Dort is away with you this weekend, do she can meet your other kids, one of whom you've only known about for six months. She doesn't know you as you decided to stay away til she was 18 and miss out on paying maintenance. So don't you think it's out of order to all talk about the past, and your mum and dad considering she is the only one who hasn't met them?
Did you know she is texting me all the time because she is upset? I doubt it you worm!!!
Just man up for once and be a bloody adult and realise its hard for her!
MadameLaMinx
Gold Member
Dear "Male person who happened to be present when I was conceived but only stuck around for ten months and then used the ultimatum you were given to take £3 and go to the pub and decide if you wanted a family life or drink and other women to escape,"
I wish you hadn't bothered to contact me at 16. Why did you? If you had known that all of my life up until that point you had been a fictional knight in shining armour that was going to come and save me from a very messed up existence, maybe you would have taken a long and hard look at yourself and decided that maybe you werent the best person for the job, but obviously you felt that you had a right to contact with your daughter. When i was a kid, i used to watch that programme with Cilla, Surprise Surprise, and fantasise about how amazing it would be to meet up with you like that. When you eventually did get round to locating me, that first phone call blew my head away. I was thrilled to bits that the missing pieces of my personal jigsaw were coming together.
More fool me.
The last twenty two years have been nothing more than a waste of my time. You claim you want a relationship with me, but you don't, clearly, because a relationship involves at least minimal effort to be able to sustain it. Something that you haven't been able to manage. I should have let things be when I wrote you a thirty page letter detailing exactly how the situation made me feel and asking you in the face of that to give me one good reason why we should bother to continue attempting to salvage this and you didn't reply.
I get that you are an alcoholic, and that makes you selfish, but did you really think that this would work out positively? You are all talk and no trousers. You make promises you can never keep, throw strops when I don't do what you want me to do, (remember your insistence that I get an abortion when I told you I was pregnant? He's 19 now, and brought up with no help from you. Or how about when I rang you to tell you I had got engaged and you subsequently ceased all contact with me?) and make promises to keep in touch that you have consistently broken, all the drunken phone calls you have subjected me to which seemed to be the only state you could remember I existed and get all possessive about me, I say "all" the drunken phone calls, I can count them all on the fingers of both hands, which for 22 years worth of contact is barely significant is it. Now, you don't even bother with that. I email you, three months later your sister yells at you and you write me a two line self centred reply with all the emotional feeling of a brick wall. They (your family up north) can see what you are missing out on here, and do their best to fill in the gaps and prove that the entire family isn't like you, and reassure me that it's nothing I have done that makes you be the way you are. When we met up at my cousins wedding, everyone there did their best to make sure our "reunion" went smoothly. Everyone except you, because you are a drunk, and wouldn't know what sincerity is if it ran up and bit you on the backside. I should have known better than to believe that things would ever be any different. If the physical distance between us didn't provide enough of a barrier, your alcoholism, your selfishness and your total inability to ever follow up on the promises you make or offer any attempt at connecting with me provide the rest. It's insurmountable.
I can't do this any more. What I am really doing is just waiting for you to hurry up and die, which I am sure won't be long now, your drinking is so out of control, so that I can grieve the loss of a relationship I was never a party to in the first place, and move on knowing that what might have been was lost to me on the day you walked out. That's not to say I think the what might have been would have necessarily been an improvement on what I did have, my half-sisters testimony as to your prowess as a parent is quite frankly terrifying and makes me almost grateful to have escaped at least that, but we will never know will we? So, I'm done. Full emotional shut-down. I can't keep putting myself through this. Enjoy what's left of your life, which like the endless bottles you consume is draining away by the minute.
No longer "your daughter".
Oh, and
Dear "sisters",
We are very different people. We have been brought up in different countries and you two are understandably incredibly close because of what you have been through together. But please don't pretend to me that you see me as your sister and it's us against the world, and then do stuff like post those ridiculous its national sisters week posts on facebook, all about a sister being the best friend you will ever have in your life and to repost if you have the worlds greatest sister, and then just tag your "real" sister in on it. I find it hard enough being in another country and not able to be a part of your daily existence, and seeing the months go by without us even exchanging a few words. I have no doubt that I will find out my new nephew or niece has been born via Facebook along with all your other friends and acquaintances. I want to be a part of your lives and for you to be a part of mine, but maybe I am just not that important to you after all.
Your hurt and distant half-sister.
I wish you hadn't bothered to contact me at 16. Why did you? If you had known that all of my life up until that point you had been a fictional knight in shining armour that was going to come and save me from a very messed up existence, maybe you would have taken a long and hard look at yourself and decided that maybe you werent the best person for the job, but obviously you felt that you had a right to contact with your daughter. When i was a kid, i used to watch that programme with Cilla, Surprise Surprise, and fantasise about how amazing it would be to meet up with you like that. When you eventually did get round to locating me, that first phone call blew my head away. I was thrilled to bits that the missing pieces of my personal jigsaw were coming together.
More fool me.
The last twenty two years have been nothing more than a waste of my time. You claim you want a relationship with me, but you don't, clearly, because a relationship involves at least minimal effort to be able to sustain it. Something that you haven't been able to manage. I should have let things be when I wrote you a thirty page letter detailing exactly how the situation made me feel and asking you in the face of that to give me one good reason why we should bother to continue attempting to salvage this and you didn't reply.
I get that you are an alcoholic, and that makes you selfish, but did you really think that this would work out positively? You are all talk and no trousers. You make promises you can never keep, throw strops when I don't do what you want me to do, (remember your insistence that I get an abortion when I told you I was pregnant? He's 19 now, and brought up with no help from you. Or how about when I rang you to tell you I had got engaged and you subsequently ceased all contact with me?) and make promises to keep in touch that you have consistently broken, all the drunken phone calls you have subjected me to which seemed to be the only state you could remember I existed and get all possessive about me, I say "all" the drunken phone calls, I can count them all on the fingers of both hands, which for 22 years worth of contact is barely significant is it. Now, you don't even bother with that. I email you, three months later your sister yells at you and you write me a two line self centred reply with all the emotional feeling of a brick wall. They (your family up north) can see what you are missing out on here, and do their best to fill in the gaps and prove that the entire family isn't like you, and reassure me that it's nothing I have done that makes you be the way you are. When we met up at my cousins wedding, everyone there did their best to make sure our "reunion" went smoothly. Everyone except you, because you are a drunk, and wouldn't know what sincerity is if it ran up and bit you on the backside. I should have known better than to believe that things would ever be any different. If the physical distance between us didn't provide enough of a barrier, your alcoholism, your selfishness and your total inability to ever follow up on the promises you make or offer any attempt at connecting with me provide the rest. It's insurmountable.
I can't do this any more. What I am really doing is just waiting for you to hurry up and die, which I am sure won't be long now, your drinking is so out of control, so that I can grieve the loss of a relationship I was never a party to in the first place, and move on knowing that what might have been was lost to me on the day you walked out. That's not to say I think the what might have been would have necessarily been an improvement on what I did have, my half-sisters testimony as to your prowess as a parent is quite frankly terrifying and makes me almost grateful to have escaped at least that, but we will never know will we? So, I'm done. Full emotional shut-down. I can't keep putting myself through this. Enjoy what's left of your life, which like the endless bottles you consume is draining away by the minute.
No longer "your daughter".
Oh, and
Dear "sisters",
We are very different people. We have been brought up in different countries and you two are understandably incredibly close because of what you have been through together. But please don't pretend to me that you see me as your sister and it's us against the world, and then do stuff like post those ridiculous its national sisters week posts on facebook, all about a sister being the best friend you will ever have in your life and to repost if you have the worlds greatest sister, and then just tag your "real" sister in on it. I find it hard enough being in another country and not able to be a part of your daily existence, and seeing the months go by without us even exchanging a few words. I have no doubt that I will find out my new nephew or niece has been born via Facebook along with all your other friends and acquaintances. I want to be a part of your lives and for you to be a part of mine, but maybe I am just not that important to you after all.
Your hurt and distant half-sister.
Shirleen
Gold Member
MadameLaMinx said:
Darling I don't know how YOU feel but I've had a similar experience, my 'dad' lives 10 minutes walk away and I haven't seen him for about twelve years! My 'sister' from his new marriage pissed me off so much last fathers day going on about how wonderful he is that I deleted her off FB!
I've quit the relationship and moved on, he's a twat with a witch of a wife, who is evil in secret.. The worst kind!
So hunny you aren't alone xxxx
Liverbird52
Gold Member
MadameLaMinx said:
Big hug,hope writing it down has done made you feel a bit better
Similar threads
Step 1 Sole Source
From elephant bum to a smaller elephants bum. Week two CD.
