My Countdown - 20 Weeks to go!

it's a pile of p**! you and only you can decide what you want to do. we can all give advice etc. could you live with it? would you want your kids to experience it? what would you say to them? how does he explain it? my grandad was an alcoholic and my mum had a bad time with him as he was pretty violent, at least you've not got that.
 
Hi Kez --

I hope you are having good visit with your father, and a better day today. I am sorry if I was too "helpful" with my advice last night.

MM
 
Oh, best best wishes and big hugs hun.

My OH was verging on alcoholism when we first went out. He didn't depend on the drink as such but - he was still messed up after his divorce 4 years before and went to the pub EVERY night, 5 or 6 pints a night. Sometimes he skipped dinner to pay for booze but what did it for me was when his kids came down to visit - he only saw them a couple of times a year then and they were quite young, 10 to 13ish - he just took them to the pub.

The crunch came after he asked to move in together - I said no because I didn't want to be a pub widow. Told him a few other things about what I though about his behaviour too, especially as regards his lovely kids. He asked me to give him a 'trial run' and blow me down, nearly 8 years on, he'll drink socially and once every couple of weeks or so but never more than that. Good as gold.

I wish you a lot of luck - marriage is a huge thing. I hope you don't think I'm patronising or offering false hope - its just a few things you said reminded me of 'old' colin!

Just to add to everyone else on here, if you ever want to chat I'm here!

xoxox
 
Evening all! Hope everyone has had a nice weekend?

I've had a chilled one, pottering. We took the dogs for a nice walk out on the towans then to the in laws for roast (cup of coffee for me). Did the shopping and now in my pajamas watching dancing on ice with a hot bath waiting for me, bliss!

Had a bit of bad news yesterday, got my size 12 friend to try on my size 16 wedding dress and it wouldn't do up! So will probably need to get another.

We've chatted long and hard this weekend and decided to put the wedding off for a year. We did so well clearing debt last year, the wedding will just put us back . We have an extension living room with no ceiling, floors etc and it will need to be put off in favour for the wedding. Plus my mum has had bad news about her immigration application to Canada, meaning they will need to be out by may. Also meaning they won't be able to afford to come over for the wedding.

So as much as we don't want to, the sensible thing is to put it back a year. We also had a good chat about our lifestyles and not doing enough together. So we're going to join up to the gym, me to lose weight, him to gain weight. And make the time once a weekend to do something together, like today taking the dogs for a nice long walk. Get the stunt kites back out, book the badminton court etc.

We're both disappointed about the wedding but it's only a delay.
 
Oh and weigh in tomorrow, for the minute I am going to stay in cd. Just going to take it a week at a time.
 
sounds like a great plan kez. i can't believe your wedding dress is that small :eek: ridiculous. it'll be fab to spend time with scott. you need to do things together.
 
Hey kez, your sound like a very wise woman!! At least some of the pressure is off now and as u say take each week as it comes! I'll join u on that one! Hope weigh in goes well! I had a handful of my nieces popcorn at the cinema today without even thinking!! Oops! Xx
 
At least it was just a handful and not the whole thing! Good luck for weigh in, I've picked all week here and there, chicken slices, pork chop, cheese strings. So if I do lose then I won't really have deserved it.

I'm starting swimming from tomorrow morning before work and will need a tetra afterwards, when usually first cd product isnt until 1pm. so depending on how I do tomorrow I might introduce a small meal in the evenings, have got plenty of chicken and quorn in the freezer. But we'll see, I'm not quite ready to give up cd just yet, I'm still going for 2-3 lbs a week however I do it.

I can't believe it's been 3 weeks of cd already? It really doesn't feel like it, but I have started to lose my determination and boredom is setting in a little. I'm just going for 1 more week at the minute and then next week I'll decide if I'm going to do another etc etc.
 
I found having an 810 week every 5th week (back in the old days when we had to lol) gave something close by to look forward to, that's how I'm planning on doing it this time too because to me 12 weeks is too long and the old metabolism forgets it's got a job to do.

Ss+ gives you that little bit extra that you might need after swimming then working all day. I don't do it too often bit I like knowing I've got that option if I need it.
 
I'm in ss+ already as I have my milk allowance. We'll see what happens, I don't expect I will need to. Swimming isn't like hammering it out in the gym is it? But I've got supllies in, just in case. Lol!

More worried about making the 3 products last all day if I have one at 8 am? Usually have 2 in the evening to stop me eating scotts packed lunch and tea!
 
Can you afford to do it so you have 4 products? I've never done it so font know how much more it is, but it's worth a thought. I'd def make sure you have one after swimming cos it makes me so hungry I could eat my own arm lol. :)
 
Kez we are so similar!! It's 4 weigh in tomorrow and even tho i'm 22 pounds down I'm losing the excitement and determination! I'm not giving up, I'm in for the journey but now the numbers have slowed down it's hard going! Iv been tested this weekend by having a friend to stay- she had had wine, chocolate, mcdonalds and crisps around me and I didn't give in. Yes I succumbed to some popcorn but 1 month ago I would have had all if the above!!

So no more goals or targets or getting hopes up! Just a steady 2lb loss a week from now will fo the trick!! Xx
 
Yay! On the home stretch now. Been for my swim, glad I went but my calfs are killing, verging on cramp I think. And I only did 28 length in 30 mins, where as before I used to do 40 length (a mile) in half hour. Never mind will build it up again, tomorrows goal is 30 and more front crawl. I must have been holding myself funny as breast stroke was making my back ache?!?
 
Hi Kez,

I am glad that you have sorted things out. A wedding is just a ceremony followed by a party that you can barely remember the next day (that is why people take so many photos LOL). When the time is right everythig should fall into place.

I really like your idea of finding things to bind you closer together. It is key to making the relationship work. My DH and I having been trying lately to make "us" time. We were sitting around one day when both kids out of the house, and we discussed how our lives have been so wrapped up around them and their needs -- that we hardly spend any time without one or the other. We've had a couple of movie dates since then... but we've actually discussed what we used to do BC (before children) and want to see if we'd enjoy some of those things again.

Swimming is such a good exercise for toning, and is kinder to the joints than most. I wish it wasn't so hard... I am an inefficient swimmer. I probably burn double the calories as I flop around the pool and zigzag down the lanes, but it is exhausting and embarassing.

I hope you have a lovely day.

MM

The breast stroke arm thing probably pulled a bit on your back muscles. You're just not used to it ATM.
 
Waiting for weigh in, CDC has a new lady!
 
5 lbs down, am chuffed! Motivation restored, for another week at least!
 
:wow:

well done. that's amazing.

:grouphugg:
 
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