The Perfect Man Should.....

[Chitty]

I think men never grow up.
The perfect man should be just the right mix of naughty and nice. He should be tidy and not leave his clothes on the floor, for wife to pick up.
He should always have time to play with the children, he should not leave the wife to organize everything..............

He should bath/shower every day, buy flowers/pressies for no reason. Hold hands in the street, not spend all his time doing his different hobbies and pass times which don't involve his family very often.....

Hmmmmm can't think of any thing else right now..... Oh the sex thing, well as long as they are intune with there partner the sex should be amazing..........................

 

[Allan G]

"Oh baby you're the BEST I've ever had!!!!!!!!!!"

Why thank you, i bet you say that to all the blokes sorry i`m not going to be another notch on your bed post i hardly know you, and would you still respect me in the morning

 

[Isis]

Sorry Lace, you have lost me

And the point of that would be ??????

LOL Bradders!!!...To bond....to bond.....

 

[Mrs Depp]

Why thank you, i bet you say that to all the blokes sorry i`m not going to be another notch on your bed post i hardly know you, and would you still respect me in the morning

ROFLMAO Sorry Allan I wasn't talking to you!

 

[Mrs Depp]

LOL Bradders!!!...To bond....to bond.....

OMG Brad! You CANNOT be serious!!

 

[Allan G]

ROFLMAO Sorry Allan I wasn't talking to you!

Oh bugger, i though my animal magnatism was was charming your knickers off

 

[Mrs Depp]

Oh bugger, i though my animal magnatism was was charming your knickers off

The Perfect Man Should ............not have to think he can rely on his "animal magnetism" as being enough to get into a lady's knickers!

 

[Allan G]

The Perfect Man Should ............not have to think he can rely on his "animal magnetism" as being enough to get into a lady's knickers!

ok a couple of pints and a takeaway is that better than my animal magnetism?? See Flowers just wilt away and die, chocolates make you put on weight and so do expensive meals out

 

[Mrs Depp]

ok a couple of pints and a takeaway is that better than my animal magnetism?? See Flowers just wilt away and die, chocolates make you put on weight and so do expensive meals out

Pints? Pints? I'll have you know I'm a laydee! I only drink from a cut crystal glass that contains a ladylike drink such as Martini or Babycham! Actually a JD and coke would suffice! And as for the takeaway, isn't that food just like the chocs and "expensive meals out"?

Flowers - yes, because they're very pretty to look at. Or the cinema, or just something thoughtful - I don't expect much-at my age I can't afford to! ROFL

By the way, is that how you tried to win your lady wife's heart? Pint of lager, curry and back to yours? Classy! lol

 

[Allan G]

No in fact she chatted me up, by saying that if i didnt talk to her she would pour my pint over my head Long story - Short version -, was engaged to a school teacher, i was stationed in Northern Ireland, fiancee shagging a bloke from the pub, i came home, found out, hit bloke in the pub, broke two fingers, patched up by Nurse in hospital, saw nurse in night club who is now wife life story finished

 

[Mrs Depp]

No in fact she chatted me up, by saying that if i didnt talk to her she would pour my pint over my head Long story - Short version -, was engaged to a school teacher, i was stationed in Northern Ireland, fiancee shagging a bloke from the pub, i came home, found out, hit bloke in the pub, broke two fingers, patched up by Nurse in hospital, saw nurse in night club who is now wife life story finished

Aww Allan that's just fate that you met your Mrs isn't it? Good on Mrs Allan for her chat up tactics!

 

[Allan G]

Aww Allan that's just fate that you met your Mrs isn't it? Good on Mrs Allan for her chat up tactics!

she stitched me up, i needed 5 stitches in my little pinkie, so she scared me for life, or branded me, one or the other

 

[Mrs Depp]

she stitched me up, i needed 5 stitches in my little pinkie, so she scared me for life, or branded me, one or the other

Haha! When you said you punched the other bloke and broke two fingers, you didn't say one of 'em was your PINKIE!!

Was it hard for you to pick your nose for a while afterwards?

 

[Allan G]

Haha! When you said you punched the other bloke and broke two fingers, you didn't say one of 'em was your PINKIE!!

Was it hard for you to pick your nose for a while afterwards?

I was only 21, young dum and full of *um, he had a broken nose and lost two teeth, so i was informed by my EX fiancee oh well the big man upstairs moves in mysterious ways

 

[Mrs Depp]

I was only 21, young dum and full of *um, he had a broken nose and lost two teeth, so i was informed by my EX fiancee oh well the big man upstairs moves in mysterious ways

You mean that you landed a lucky punch lol. Does your Mrs swoon at your battle scar then?

 

[Allan G]

You mean that you landed a lucky punch lol. Does your Mrs swoon at your battle scar then?

Lucky my arse, at 21 i was Light middle weight Boxing for my Regiment, i would be in the heavyweight division now Thats only a little one, i have a couple of better one`s recieved at work, by my adoring public

 

[Mrs Depp]

Lucky my arse, at 21 i was Light middle weight Boxing for my Regiment, i would be in the heavyweight division now Thats only a little one, i have a couple of better one`s recieved at work, by my adoring public

Ooh you have battle scars on your arse then?

 

[Allan G]

Ooh you have battle scars on your arse then?

No cos i wouldnt turn my back on anyone in my job I am an Authorised firearms officer, so it`s pretty serious when i get deployed

 

[Mrs Depp]

No cos i wouldnt turn my back on anyone in my job

Me neither - especially when I'm on the door 'greeting' at work! lol

I am an Authorised firearms officer, so it`s pretty serious when i get deployed

I bet you say that to Mrs Allan! "Watch out luv, I'm about to deploy my weapon, assume the position I'm goin; in!"

 

[Allan G]

no thats Austrailian foreplay - Brace your self sheila im comming in