Constant Criticism The New Venting Thread!!!

Discussion in 'Lighter Life Forum' started by Huseyin, 16 March 2009 Social URL.

  1. Huseyin

    Huseyin Silver Member

    Posts:
    964
    Likes Received:
    31
    Start Weight:
    17st2.8lb
    Current Weight:
    17st2.8lb
    Goal Weight:
    12st0lb
    Lost(%):
    0st0lb(0%)
    Diet:
    Lighter Life
    Im starting to get pretty fed up of people's attitudes in general. All i ever hear is you look too skinny, you need to put on a stone.

    Today i had a work collegue take me aside and say "listen we are all worried about you and people are asking if you are ok"

    Seriously its starting to bug me and this is the thread where we can all share those experiences.

    So post away the negatively and rejoice :)
     
    Serena A likes this.
  2. Avatar

    MiniMins.com Matched Content

  3. lovelynaett

    lovelynaett Full Member

    Posts:
    74
    Likes Received:
    3
    Start Weight:
    19st0lb
    Current Weight:
    17st9lb
    Goal Weight:
    10st9lb
    Lost(%):
    1st5lb(7.14%)
    Diet:
    Cambrigde Diet
    Hi there.

    I totally get what you're going through. I had the same problem last year while doing LL. And it got to a point where I gave up my diet, forgetting that I was doing it for me and nobody else. One ask me if i was dying...Seriously, I had nice clothes on and make up and done my hair too, I was ready to party!!

    Now I'm back on another program. And it's fine, hard still, but fine. I know I'm stronger and can face people although I haven't told most people I know only a handul that I can trust (really trust). The rest will see how I lose along the way. I think it's the fact that I didn't eat for so long they thought I could not celebrate by eating heavely and drink like them...Or maybe they were just jealous because all of the sudden I was the one guys came to talk too when we were out partying...

    But don't care now, it's done and been dealt with, now I'm back with a vengence and will succeed.

    Don't pay attention to them, they need to do the adjustment to you not you.
     
  4. Guy

    Guy Likes to lurk

    Posts:
    306
    Likes Received:
    24
    This thread is good timing. Had something just this morning.

    After all I've been through and losing over 8 stone my wife described me as a hunch back whose skin is too big for his body!

    In reality all she was doing was making fun of my bad posture (it is bad) and my (somewhat) saggy bits but I'm ill and just didn't need it today. Just goes to show, you can't please everyone all of the time. It feels like I can't please anyone any of the time at the mo.

    God, how pathetic do I sound today.....
     
  5. Serena A

    Serena A Can't think of a title

    Posts:
    1,757
    Likes Received:
    88
    Start Weight:
    14st12lb
    Current Weight:
    8st12lb
    Goal Weight:
    9st0lb
    Lost(%):
    6st0lb(40.38%)
    Diet:
    Maintaining, was on CD
    I was told recently "you look well but my god you've really lost your chest" - I mean how rude!!

    Also that someone was amazed that I'd not dived head first into uncontrollable eating the minute I moved up the Cambridge steps because they didn't think I would have that level of self control (although I'll take that one as a compliment - bah!)
     
  6. Guy

    Guy Likes to lurk

    Posts:
    306
    Likes Received:
    24
    I have another one. My mother in law said to me a couple of weeks ago 'you look like XX did when he lost loads of weight. He looked awful!'

    Thanks very much......
     
  7. pete10141748

    pete10141748 Postaholic

    Posts:
    1,957
    Likes Received:
    164
    Diet:
    LighterLife for Men (VLCD)
    Some people at work have started phrasing things like "So how much longer on you on this awful thing?" which is annoying!

    My parents have started telling me I should stop now too.
    They say it's because, after over 5 months of abstinance, they are worried about the long-term health effects of the diet.

    TBH I'm not so sure, I just think they are so used to the big me that the first couple of stone to go was OK as I didn't change *that* much, but now that I've basically lost 1/4 of my bodyweight they are suddenly faced with a completely different son, in both body and mind (attitude at least!)


    One thing's for sure, no way am I stopping yet - it's not even what the scales say lately, I just know that I still have plenty of bits of me I don't want to have anymore :p
     
  8. roundrachel

    roundrachel Silver Member

    Posts:
    1,030
    Likes Received:
    64
    Diet:
    Lighter Life
    I keep getting random people asking me 'and how's your weight'? Like it's now a matter for public discussion. I've lost it all and I'm keeping it off (and have done for five months now) If I were to go up to someone at work and say, 'how was your weekend, did you put any weight on?' they'd be horrified.

    I need to find some witty comeback. they ask me 'how's your weight?' and reply 'fine thanks, how's that nasty rash on your privates'?. It's just as personal!

    My weight is my business. Not that of friends, neighbours, colleagues. The fact they think they all think they can constantly talk about it so bluntly to me really frustrates me! They don't do it to anyone else so why me? Grrrr
     
    cah-ching likes this.
  9. Guy

    Guy Likes to lurk

    Posts:
    306
    Likes Received:
    24
    I know what you mean. What I eat at my desk has now become a spectator sport....
     
  10. Blonde Logic

    Blonde Logic Yes. You can.

    Posts:
    9,908
    Likes Received:
    343
    Start Weight:
    258lb
    Current Weight:
    228lb
    Goal Weight:
    168lb
    Lost(%):
    30lb(11.63%)
    Diet:
    cambridge
    Good grief. When did people stop minding their own business so much!! What awful comment syou are all enduring.

    Ya know what I would be tempted to do the next time someone approaches you and tells you you look too thin, like you are ill/dying, not healthy, etc....I would call over a slimmer colleague in the presence of the moaner and tell them So-and-so thinks you look AWFUL and like youa re going to DIE!

    See how they back-peddle out if then. If they say, "I never said that" tell then - "Yes you did - you just said it to me - but they are slimmer then me so you must think its even worse for them!" See how they get out of it then.

    That really angers me you all have to cope with that.

    I was so lucky - never had that issue come up with anyone. Turns out everyone I worked with is much nicer then I gave them credit for!! hehe


    I would be tempted to start throwing some barbed comments back at them. Like, "Next time you realise one of your dreams, be sure to let me know so I can sh*t all over it like you have just done to me"

    Bloody rude people.
     
  11. futureyummymummy

    futureyummymummy Silver Member

    Posts:
    1,168
    Likes Received:
    56
    Start Weight:
    22st0lb
    Current Weight:
    17st5lb
    Goal Weight:
    8st0lb
    Lost(%):
    4st9lb(21.1%)
    Diet:
    Lean in 15
    I've had the rude comments from the girls in my group, I was told I should be on rtm or lll as I was fading away (I'm still quite over weight and have a way to go). It made me so self concious I went away ate like a pig and gained 4lbs just to feel like I 'fit in', I think I've lost all but 1lb of it this week but won't know til next week as I can't get to WI. It's funny how peoples attitudes can affect us isn't it?

    Thankfully I had a good chat with someone on msn last night and they've made me realise a few things one being that I actually don't want to 'fit in' with people like that and I certainly don't care if they like me or not, it's not my fault that I've lost more than all of them (even the ones who started at the same time as me and were bigger) and I'm not going to sabotage myself to suit them grrr.

    Ooo sorry for the rant but once I start I can't seem to stop lol.

    Emma xXx
     
    SerenityValley likes this.
  12. brumchick

    brumchick Full Member

    Posts:
    205
    Likes Received:
    17
    Start Weight:
    15st4lb
    Current Weight:
    10st8lb
    Goal Weight:
    10st7lb
    Lost(%):
    4st10lb(30.84%)
    Diet:
    LL
    Must be something to do with the phase of the moon! Ive had a few this weekend- all from people who barely know me,like "you should stop now your fine"- no i'm still medically overweight- what she meant was I am the same size as her- maybe ok for her ,not for me.
    and "those sort of diets dont work you should go to ww" durr have lost 3.5 stone so is working for me!
    Fortunately for me those whose opinions I value are all on side.
    I agree its the downright rudeness of people who think its ok to judge us. LLers unite against bad manners :)
     
  13. medhurst37

    medhurst37 Full Member

    Posts:
    89
    Likes Received:
    3
    I think you've touched a raw nerve here, haven't you noticed that those who pass comment/judgment are at either end of the extreme, either overweight themselves or very slim, I think its a case of jealousy from both groups. Although one exception to this is my husband who has suggested I see the GP about having a boob job, well thanks for you positive comments !! I think he meant well.
     
  14. thunderthighs

    thunderthighs Silver Member

    Posts:
    822
    Likes Received:
    20
    Current Weight:
    9st7lb
    Diet:
    Healthy eating
    Could it not be a case of some people are concerned. They have probably never seen the drastic losses you all have on VLCD so to some it can be quite alarming. Also it does show on the face dramatically as well until the weight stabalizes for a few months and then things even out a bit more. That's one of the reasons I don't think you can compare someone who has lost alot of weight rapidly to someone who is even slimmer but is probably that size naturally. Just my take on things...I really don't think there can be that many rude people around, just concerned?
     
  15. MandyLupton

    MandyLupton Gold Member

    Posts:
    2,878
    Likes Received:
    49
    Start Weight:
    20st2.0lb
    Current Weight:
    20st2.0lb
    Goal Weight:
    12st0lb
    Lost(%):
    0st0lb(0%)
    Diet:
    S&S
    I'm quite lucky at the moment everyone who has mentioned my weightloss have been very positive and complementary but I still have 4 to 5 stone to go. I expect when I get nearer my target I will receive some negative comments.
     
  16. charliegirl

    charliegirl Silver Member

    Posts:
    772
    Likes Received:
    79
    Diet:
    Gastric Bypass
    Lets form a line and do a virtual moonie at the lot of them....xx
     
    1 person likes this.
  17. roundrachel

    roundrachel Silver Member

    Posts:
    1,030
    Likes Received:
    64
    Diet:
    Lighter Life
    I'm more than ready to show them my bum!
     
  18. Avatar

    MiniMins.com Advert

  19. Foxtrot

    Foxtrot Is back in the saddle!

    Posts:
    1,385
    Likes Received:
    35
    Start Weight:
    15st5.6lb
    Current Weight:
    14st5.8lb
    Goal Weight:
    12st7.0lb
    Lost(%):
    0st13.8lb(6.4%)
    Diet:
    5:2 Fasting
    No one, apart from OH who can now touch his own elbows when giving me a cuddle and he thinks it's great, has yet commented to me about my weight loss.

    However, one of the main reasons I don't do the group meetings now, apart from I didn't get anything out of them much, was several nasty comments from those who were there losing with me and supposed to be as supportive as the next one in the group.

    Surprising where the stab in the back comes from sometimes. We obvioulsy can't all hope to be as perfect as them.
     
  20. Foxtrot

    Foxtrot Is back in the saddle!

    Posts:
    1,385
    Likes Received:
    35
    Start Weight:
    15st5.6lb
    Current Weight:
    14st5.8lb
    Goal Weight:
    12st7.0lb
    Lost(%):
    0st13.8lb(6.4%)
    Diet:
    5:2 Fasting
    Oh and PS, I've still got plenty of bum, if a little trimmer now, to show them all too.
     
  21. Blonde Logic

    Blonde Logic Yes. You can.

    Posts:
    9,908
    Likes Received:
    343
    Start Weight:
    258lb
    Current Weight:
    228lb
    Goal Weight:
    168lb
    Lost(%):
    30lb(11.63%)
    Diet:
    cambridge

    YEah, like this:

    :massmoon: :D
     
  22. annaphylactic

    annaphylactic Guess who's back...?

    Posts:
    1,395
    Likes Received:
    84
    Start Weight:
    16st10lb
    Current Weight:
    13st7.5lb
    Goal Weight:
    10st7lb
    Lost(%):
    3st2.5lb(19.02%)
    Diet:
    Slimming World
    All together now...

    :kissass::kissass::kissass::kissass::kissass::kissass::kissass::kissass:
    KISS...... MY...... ASS!

    I'm hot and you're not!

    Not mature - but bugger it, neither is 'are you dying?' (I had that one too... well, "we thought you were really ill and didn't want to ask because we thought it was serious" but close enough)...

    Gawd bless 'em xx
     
Popular Forums
  1. MiniMins.com is a weight loss support community helping each other on their weight loss journey. We have a multitude of forums, from Slimming World and Exante, to Success Stories. Click the logo at the top right to return to the forum home page at any time.
Loading...